Dragons, Monsters, and Men: Review
🏃🏼 Being Great:
Dr. Peterson has contemplated this idea for a long time and he speaks with clarity when he addresses it. The fundamental question is: “Are you good the way you are?” His answer to that is no. I am a little uncomfortable with this idea (maybe that is how it is supposed to make us feel). I have the belief that humans have worth regardless of who they are or what they do. It is not clear to me that the answer to the question are you good the way you are is no. There are parts of all of us that are good the way they are. And sometimes we need to be told that so we don’t judge ourselves into unnecessary anguish.
The idea is that you can always be better, but better is a comparison. We need to have a metric of comparison to determine things like better or worse. I think that Dr. Peterson's metric is the ability to handle complications and worries that life will inevitably throw your way. If going through an experience makes you more competent in handling life's hardships, you have become a better part of yourself. Then the question becomes why hardship? I think because the hard things are more valuable. For example, running a marathon is quite difficult, that's what makes it valuable and inspiring. If it was easy, a lot more people would do it and it will lose some of that value.
"Work as hard as you possibly can on at least one thing and see what happens." --Jordan Peterson.
👺 Lying:
Lying came up a couple of times during the show. All religions prohibit or at least refrain us from lying. Immanuel Kant was an advocate of not lying no matter the consequences. He believed that no lie could be noble or good. What if the truth hurts? What if we can get away with lying a little bit? Simon Sinek in his book the infinite game talks about ethical fading. When we come across a difficult moral decision, our mind is tempted to do the unethical. For example, we can convince ourselves that lying for a noble cause can be good. Simon Sinek addresses it in a business setting. Imagine that you are in a leadership position at a successful company. People look up to you. If you make an unethical decision in the heat of pressure, that gives the green light to other employees to do the same. This can create a culture that can tarnish the vision of the company. Ethical fading could also happen to one person. We can gradually become habitual liars if we allow ourselves to "lie a little bit.”
“The first principle is that you must not fool yourself — and you are the easiest person to fool.” --Richard Feynman.
We should strive to tell the truth even if it is uncomfortable at the moment. If you kept lying, at a point it could become way worse than telling the truth and facing short-term negative emotions.
🐲 Dragons:
Dragons are the obstacles that stand in our way of achieving what we want to achieve. For example, let's say I want to run a Marathon and I can’t even run 1 mile right now. That is a dragon. I can start there and gradually move up.
Overcoming obstacles willingly is the way forward. The word willingly has tremendous importance here. This is where the concept of choice comes in. We all have experienced that things that we choose on our own have more significance to us than others. They seem more personal. It is more worthwhile to choose our trials than for our trials to be chosen by the outside world.
Our goals should not be too big so that we give up on them because it is too much for us to do. They also can’t be too small so that we do not grow from them. An adequate goal is something in the middle. Something that stretches us enough so that we can grow from it, but not too hard that we could never overcome it. There is one thing I would like to add to this. Most of the time, we set goals for ourselves about things we feel like we should do. One reason for this could be the desire for the result. Like the recognition from other people after finishing a Marathon or a letter grade after passing a course. Although these things are good to have, they are more like sidequests. Examples of the main goal are learning perseverance, becoming fitter, and acquiring knowledge.
It could be dangerous to attach our self-worth to the results. We are only entitled to our effort. There is tremendous power in trying your best and accepting all the consequences without judgment.
“I don’t mind losing as long as I see improvement or I feel I’ve done as well as I possibly could.” --Carol Dweck.
Results are judgments by definition. Judgments are artifacts of human perception and not the characteristic of the actual world so it's wise not to spend too much energy on them. Dr. Carol Dweck coined the term growth mindset in her amazing book "Mindset." A growth mindset puts more emphasis on efforts rather than results. Of course, this is hard to do because it is not comfortable being aware of our internal state.
